With Dad on our mind, I thought we'd chat about ways to help the guys in our life be more healthy. Of course, they are grown adults in charge of their own health, but I have often found that guys need a little nudge towards making healthier choices. And isn't nice to spend a little time taking special care of them? Here are five ideas to help the guys in your life stay in top form.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 15, 2016
#OneSwap: 5 Ways to Help the Men in your Life Stay in Top Form
You guys, Father's Day is this Sunday. Can you even believe that? It feels like the summer has just barely started, and we are already hitting one of the big seasonal milestones.
With Dad on our mind, I thought we'd chat about ways to help the guys in our life be more healthy. Of course, they are grown adults in charge of their own health, but I have often found that guys need a little nudge towards making healthier choices. And isn't nice to spend a little time taking special care of them? Here are five ideas to help the guys in your life stay in top form.
With Dad on our mind, I thought we'd chat about ways to help the guys in our life be more healthy. Of course, they are grown adults in charge of their own health, but I have often found that guys need a little nudge towards making healthier choices. And isn't nice to spend a little time taking special care of them? Here are five ideas to help the guys in your life stay in top form.
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
On Faith
The funny thing about being a big family-homeschooling-farmer's wife mama is that people who don't know you (or even those who do) tend to view you in a certain way. Certain assumptions are made about what you might believe, what your life is like, what your values are. And often those might be safe assumptions. But just as often, they will prove to be misleading. I have already written about debunking the myth of a perfect life in terms of "doing it all" (most irritating phrase ever, amiright?!). But I also can't deny that I have been enormously blessed in terms of a happy marriage and these five sweet children, and so many other things, and that can read as "perfect" to some people. I know how easy it can be to look at someone else's life (online especially!) and feel like they have a more ideal life in some way.
But here is the truth:
Each of us has been given some gifts, and each of us has been given some brokenness, and what we do with the two define our lives.
I have been feeling a nudge to tell you the story of how we became a family. And I have been ignoring that feeling because the idea that anyone would ever be interested in hearing this story seems like total narcissism to me. But I have also learned to pay attention to when an idea won't leave you alone.
If you haven't guessed, I am a Type-A, oldest child, perfectionist. I have known exactly what I wanted to do with my life since I was about 10, and I knew what I need to do to get there. I had a plan. I was good at school. I worked hard. I didn't get into trouble. I had my steps mapped out... through age 50. On paper. (Now there is a cringe-worthy read). High school-good college-law school-politics-rule the world-done. I am not really kidding. I didn't want children and I was only vaguely interested in getting married.
I had just graduated from college, and I was in my first year of law school. I loved it. I had a great apartment downtown Chicago, good friends, and I was having a good time. Seth was getting his Masters back down in Champaign, and we were in the middle of a maybe-breakup over distance and priorities. But things were mostly going as planned.
About four months into my first year, I started feeling really unwell. Like, I thought I got food poisoning. More than once. Hmm. And I was a level of exhausted that I hadn't known existed before. I thought I was just working so hard that I was overly stressed. (HAHAAHAHA. I die. Sweet 22 year old me. Bless her heart. You all know where this is going. I had no clue). After yet another week where I was whining about feeling awful, a girlfriend in my study group said, "Cheer up! At least you're not pregnant!"
Well. About $200 in pregnancy tests later, every one of them agreed that I was very pregnant.
A baby was not in my plan at all, let alone during my 1L year. So before I did anything else, I called Planned Parenthood and made an appointment. You guys, I had this handled. I was so sure of myself, I didn't even tell Seth before I made the appointment. (Seriously, it really didn't even occur to me that he might have an opinion. As in, it did not even cross my mind once). I called and told him when to show up, and that was that. I wasn't delighted about it, but I wasn't worried about it either. I could go on and on and tell you that it was an agonizing decision, but that would be a lie. I had zero second thoughts about it.
The day comes and they do an ultrasound first. Turns out I am almost 12 weeks pregnant, which is on the later side, but still in the "okay to proceed" zone. Fine with me. We have to go back out to the waiting room and wait some more. And I am just sitting there on those plastic chairs looking around the room at a bunch of other girls waiting too. Every single one of them was probably between 14-18, and they were all so alone. Not a boyfriend, not a best friend, not a mama with them. Each of them looked scared to death.
Out of nowhere, I felt like God spoke directly to me and told me that we were doing the wrong thing. We did not belong here. This was highly ridiculous to me at the time, seeing as I did not believe in God, and certainly He had never spent any time talking to me and telling me what to do. So obviously I tried my best to ignore it, because I was not a stupid girl who acted on voices in her head. But it was absolutely insistent about being obeyed. So to Seth's total shock, I stood up and walked out. We got in a cab and went directly to Barnes and Noble and bought parenting books. And I have never even had one second of wondering if that was the right thing. Not a single doubt, not even one moment where I looked back at my own plans for my life, and wished I had made a different choice.
To this day, I cannot tell you why I obeyed. I am terrible at being told what to do, and I am a born skeptic. The idea that God might being speaking to me or have a plan for my life was inconceivable to me. I knew that I would be seriously disappointing some of the people closest to me. Even Seth had a few stunned minutes of "what the hell just happened in there?" And trust me, I would not understand it either if it hadn't happened to me.
When I woke up that morning, having a baby was the last thing on earth I wanted. When I went to bed that night, that baby was the only thing I wanted. I can't give a more satisfying explanation of WHY such a sea change occurred...
One of my dearest friends told me later: "My mom and I have been together praying all day that you would change your mind. I just knew it was the wrong thing for you." At the time, that didn't strike me. Now, that brings tears to my eyes. Because the thing is, there are so many ways you can handle it when someone close to you is acting against your deepest values. Loving her anyway and quietly praying is such an underrated and underused form of love and faith.
I terrify myself every day thinking about what if I had been stubborn and prideful, and not obeyed something that I did not yet understand. Because I well know my nature. It is only grace that saved me.
And I still don't understand grace well enough to tell you it was a sure thing - that, of course, I would have always chosen this way. But I know enough to tell you this:
He has given me everything I did not think I wanted, but exactly what I needed. I know enough to tell you that the Lord will mess with all your perfectly laid plans, to give you the purpose and the plan that He has for you, if you listen. And that His purpose for your life is better than your best ideas, by far. (Consider these: Me leaving my job to stay at home. Having five kids. Homeschooling. Being a farmer's wife. Owning my own business. Writing this post.)
The point you can look back at and say, "that is exactly where everything changed." I am so grateful for the mercy and JOY that she is in our lives.
If Jesus is not your thing, I get that. I really do. And I'm not trying to change your mind. I don't really think you can "bring people to God" or whatever else evangelism tells church people to do. But I do believe in telling our stories. In saying "this is what God has done for me, and I can't explain it, and it may seem messy, but there it is."
Maybe you have something in front of you where you feel an insistent push to take action, and I just want to say: DO IT. Act in obedience. You don't have to see all the whole path in order to take that first step. The odd thing is, God rewarded my obedience to something I had no faith in by then giving me faith. When I look back now, it is obvious to me that there was always a greater plan for my life, I just didn't know it yet. And I couldn't see it. Every painful situation from my past has given something that I needed to fulfill my purpose now. I might not always like it, but I can see how it all connects.
If you are not there yet, stay open. Pay attention. Listen to those nudges carefully.
Lest this all seem too simple and rosy, I should tell you that very few people had the same sense of peace about this course of events as I did at the time. Our various sets of parents were very unhappy and disappointed in us, and at one point some were even fairly aggressive about trying to talk us into making a different choice. Someone close to me is still so disappointed that I didn't stick to my original plan that they have barely looked me in the eye in the past 12 years. We were young and broke and we made plenty of mistakes along the way too. But we have loved each other, and our girl, every day since then and she is deeply loved by our friends and family as well.
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| Mother's Day 2016 |
But here is the truth:
Comparison is a losing game, every single time.
Each of us has been given some gifts, and each of us has been given some brokenness, and what we do with the two define our lives.
I have been feeling a nudge to tell you the story of how we became a family. And I have been ignoring that feeling because the idea that anyone would ever be interested in hearing this story seems like total narcissism to me. But I have also learned to pay attention to when an idea won't leave you alone.
Because this story is one of how obedience to those quiet feelings can change everything.
I had just graduated from college, and I was in my first year of law school. I loved it. I had a great apartment downtown Chicago, good friends, and I was having a good time. Seth was getting his Masters back down in Champaign, and we were in the middle of a maybe-breakup over distance and priorities. But things were mostly going as planned.
About four months into my first year, I started feeling really unwell. Like, I thought I got food poisoning. More than once. Hmm. And I was a level of exhausted that I hadn't known existed before. I thought I was just working so hard that I was overly stressed. (HAHAAHAHA. I die. Sweet 22 year old me. Bless her heart. You all know where this is going. I had no clue). After yet another week where I was whining about feeling awful, a girlfriend in my study group said, "Cheer up! At least you're not pregnant!"
Well. About $200 in pregnancy tests later, every one of them agreed that I was very pregnant.
There are a million and one things about the story from this point that break my heart and I would do SO differently now. But I am not ashamed to tell it, because it is the foundation of my entire life.
A baby was not in my plan at all, let alone during my 1L year. So before I did anything else, I called Planned Parenthood and made an appointment. You guys, I had this handled. I was so sure of myself, I didn't even tell Seth before I made the appointment. (Seriously, it really didn't even occur to me that he might have an opinion. As in, it did not even cross my mind once). I called and told him when to show up, and that was that. I wasn't delighted about it, but I wasn't worried about it either. I could go on and on and tell you that it was an agonizing decision, but that would be a lie. I had zero second thoughts about it.
The day comes and they do an ultrasound first. Turns out I am almost 12 weeks pregnant, which is on the later side, but still in the "okay to proceed" zone. Fine with me. We have to go back out to the waiting room and wait some more. And I am just sitting there on those plastic chairs looking around the room at a bunch of other girls waiting too. Every single one of them was probably between 14-18, and they were all so alone. Not a boyfriend, not a best friend, not a mama with them. Each of them looked scared to death.
Out of nowhere, I felt like God spoke directly to me and told me that we were doing the wrong thing. We did not belong here. This was highly ridiculous to me at the time, seeing as I did not believe in God, and certainly He had never spent any time talking to me and telling me what to do. So obviously I tried my best to ignore it, because I was not a stupid girl who acted on voices in her head. But it was absolutely insistent about being obeyed. So to Seth's total shock, I stood up and walked out. We got in a cab and went directly to Barnes and Noble and bought parenting books. And I have never even had one second of wondering if that was the right thing. Not a single doubt, not even one moment where I looked back at my own plans for my life, and wished I had made a different choice.
I immediately felt a sense of peace wash over me, and it never left.
To this day, I cannot tell you why I obeyed. I am terrible at being told what to do, and I am a born skeptic. The idea that God might being speaking to me or have a plan for my life was inconceivable to me. I knew that I would be seriously disappointing some of the people closest to me. Even Seth had a few stunned minutes of "what the hell just happened in there?" And trust me, I would not understand it either if it hadn't happened to me.
When I woke up that morning, having a baby was the last thing on earth I wanted. When I went to bed that night, that baby was the only thing I wanted. I can't give a more satisfying explanation of WHY such a sea change occurred...
Except maybe this:
One of my dearest friends told me later: "My mom and I have been together praying all day that you would change your mind. I just knew it was the wrong thing for you." At the time, that didn't strike me. Now, that brings tears to my eyes. Because the thing is, there are so many ways you can handle it when someone close to you is acting against your deepest values. Loving her anyway and quietly praying is such an underrated and underused form of love and faith.
Today, that baby, Olivia Kaileen, the joy of our hearts, turns 11.
ELEVEN.
I terrify myself every day thinking about what if I had been stubborn and prideful, and not obeyed something that I did not yet understand. Because I well know my nature. It is only grace that saved me.
And I still don't understand grace well enough to tell you it was a sure thing - that, of course, I would have always chosen this way. But I know enough to tell you this:
He has built me a life of undeserved peace and blessings, on that one act of obedience.
He has given me everything I did not think I wanted, but exactly what I needed. I know enough to tell you that the Lord will mess with all your perfectly laid plans, to give you the purpose and the plan that He has for you, if you listen. And that His purpose for your life is better than your best ideas, by far. (Consider these: Me leaving my job to stay at home. Having five kids. Homeschooling. Being a farmer's wife. Owning my own business. Writing this post.)
This girl is the before-and-after dividing line of my life.
The point you can look back at and say, "that is exactly where everything changed." I am so grateful for the mercy and JOY that she is in our lives.
It took me another five years to even pick up a Bible.
If Jesus is not your thing, I get that. I really do. And I'm not trying to change your mind. I don't really think you can "bring people to God" or whatever else evangelism tells church people to do. But I do believe in telling our stories. In saying "this is what God has done for me, and I can't explain it, and it may seem messy, but there it is."
Maybe you have something in front of you where you feel an insistent push to take action, and I just want to say: DO IT. Act in obedience. You don't have to see all the whole path in order to take that first step. The odd thing is, God rewarded my obedience to something I had no faith in by then giving me faith. When I look back now, it is obvious to me that there was always a greater plan for my life, I just didn't know it yet. And I couldn't see it. Every painful situation from my past has given something that I needed to fulfill my purpose now. I might not always like it, but I can see how it all connects.
And where I can't see the connection yet? I wait.
If you are not there yet, stay open. Pay attention. Listen to those nudges carefully.
If this happens to be your exact situation, know that I am not implying that everyone should make the same choices I did. If it would help, I am happy to talk anytime.
It will be okay, I promise.
Friday, May 13, 2016
Saying No: What I Do Not Do
Originally I was just going to update a post that I wrote back in 2011, but as I read through it, I quickly realized that so much has changed since I wrote it five years ago (holy smokes, five years, really?!) Our lives look very different now. Everything I said in that post is still true, except my cleaning lady comes even more often now and does even more for me, and one other big one: work. In the past two years I have moved from being a homeschooling mama to being a homeschooling mama who runs a fairly large business. This is probably my favorite shift we've ever made. I finally feel settled into a family-career place where I am living in line with both my priorities and my personality. Hallelujah!
That being true, I do spend quite a bit of my previously "free" time (hahahahahahaha. I had five kids under 7 at that point. I must have been nuts. There was no free time.) on running my business. That means I now say no to even more things than I did in 2011.
All that being said, if you missed me on Periscope yesterday (follow me @ArbonneVPSWenzel), here is a non-comprehensive list.
I don't say no to these things because they are fundamentally bad-on the contrary, many of them may be either amazing or necessary or useful or fun. But...
Instead, saying no to these things has allowed me to add to my "yes" pile of good things that I really value, and to spend time on the things that are currently on my top priorities list. Discipline in this area (saying no to something when it is not an essential priority) truly creates freedom in every other area of my life. If something fits into my priorities list, I make sure that my actions reflect that. If it does not, I don't do it. If it needs to get done, but it doesn't need to get done by me, I delegate it. Simple as that.
There is always a constantly evolving balance of opportunities that arise and abilities - seasons of life that change and priorities that shift. Once we think we have found a comfy place to say "we've arrived!", something changes. A dear friend and I just recently texted each other that life seems to have gotten a little bit easier lately-the kids are growing up a bit, and neither of us have added a baby in about three years. So of course both of us, without discussing it previously, made a decision to take on the same large unknown ministry project. :) Some of us have personalities that just need to keep moving forward, always reassessing our lives and adding to our pile of "good things" as we feel able. We always want to keep reaching for that next right thing. (If that is NOT you - if you really struggle with knowing what the next right thing is, or if you just can't say no to things, try Lysa Terkeurst's The Best Yes. I led a group on it last year, and it was both practical and encouraging on those issues!)
Please believe me when I tell you this:
No one. Some of us are just really good at presenting that face to the world. Be encouraged, my friends. Each thing you say "no" to makes room for the best things your life has for you!
That being true, I do spend quite a bit of my previously "free" time (hahahahahahaha. I had five kids under 7 at that point. I must have been nuts. There was no free time.) on running my business. That means I now say no to even more things than I did in 2011.
All that being said, if you missed me on Periscope yesterday (follow me @ArbonneVPSWenzel), here is a non-comprehensive list.
What I Do NOT Do (and who does do them, at my house):
- Iron (the dry cleaner)
- Deep clean (Swift Cleaning)
- Work for an income on someone else's schedule (I am 100% in control of my own business schedule. The end amen forever. I work for no money for my kids all darn day long though!)
- Cook breakfast (Seth)
- Various homeschool opportunities that didn't work for our schedule and goals (people it did work for)
- Fold laundry (Swift Cleaning)
- Watch TV (the kids, mostly. I am so tempted to pull that stupid thing out of the wall.)
- Volunteer for a job or that ministry I will dread or that doesn't work for my family's schedule (people who would enjoy it, or who just can't say no, presumably)
- Learn photoshop (hired it out to Manda Julaine Designs)
- Bake bread (hired it out to my friend Alicia)
- Garden (teenage boy)
- Teach Sunday School (people who love children's ministry, one would hope)
- Work on the farm (the people employed to do that)
- Car pool (not even an option for us since we live so far out!)
- Play video games (I don't know who does this, but I know it is a thing)
- Group fitness classes (doesn't work with my priorities and schedule. I do all individual fitness or streaming classes.)
- Graphic design (Manda Julaine Designs)
- Commute (neither of us anymore, hurray!)
- Make lunch (the kids)
- Toddler activities of any kind (sorry boys!)
- Any team activity that requires more than one meeting per week (not gonna happen until it proves enormously worthy to us)
I don't say no to these things because they are fundamentally bad-on the contrary, many of them may be either amazing or necessary or useful or fun. But...
YOU CANNOT DO EVERYTHING.
There is always a constantly evolving balance of opportunities that arise and abilities - seasons of life that change and priorities that shift. Once we think we have found a comfy place to say "we've arrived!", something changes. A dear friend and I just recently texted each other that life seems to have gotten a little bit easier lately-the kids are growing up a bit, and neither of us have added a baby in about three years. So of course both of us, without discussing it previously, made a decision to take on the same large unknown ministry project. :) Some of us have personalities that just need to keep moving forward, always reassessing our lives and adding to our pile of "good things" as we feel able. We always want to keep reaching for that next right thing. (If that is NOT you - if you really struggle with knowing what the next right thing is, or if you just can't say no to things, try Lysa Terkeurst's The Best Yes. I led a group on it last year, and it was both practical and encouraging on those issues!)
Please believe me when I tell you this:
NO ONE DOES IT ALL.
No one. Some of us are just really good at presenting that face to the world. Be encouraged, my friends. Each thing you say "no" to makes room for the best things your life has for you!
Wednesday, May 11, 2016
Survival Mode: Tricks to Get You Through the Toughest Times
I know so many mamas doing hard things. Gosh, you guys are resilient. I am constantly impressed by the mothers I know. Whether you are in survival mode for the short term, because you have a new baby, or your husband is gone for a little while, or whether survival mode is a long-term proposition for you, because you have a bunch of kiddos under ten, or because you are going back to work after being at home, here are some ideas that helped me. I feel like I have been in survival mode SO often during the last 12 years, from being in law school with a new baby and working in the legal clinic, to working full-time, to having four more babies in quick succession, to farming and starting a business and homeschooling....whatever your struggle is, I can understand your feelings, even if I haven't been in your situation. But you don't need to be stuck there! Here are some tricks that help me when I am overwhelmed:
Awareness
A good first step is acknowledging the situation. The times when I have gotten myself into the most trouble are when I was determined to be superwoman, that I was going to power through, that I could do EVERYTHING myself. And that does work, usually for about three weeks. And then it falls apart. The best thing you can do is to be aware when you are in too deep. I am assuming here that there is nothing major you can/want to do to actually CHANGE your situation (you're probably not giving that sweet baby back, right?!), but I do hope there are some things we can do to mitigate your stress while you move through it.
An essential beginning step for me, for feeling more in control, is to think through and prioritize what needs to be done. One defining feature of survival mode is that you CANNOT do every single thing that is on your plate. It is absolutely inevitable that things are going to fall off the plate-the key is that YOU choose which things get dropped, instead of allowing life to make random determinations. Over the years, I have figured out an easy way to help me define my priorities during crazy times:
1) Write down three things that make me feel bad about myself or my house or my family when they are not done. These might be things like a healthy dinner, clean laundry, a swept floor, a good school day, church attendance, my workout....anything that will nag at you and make you feel ugh about yourself.
2) Write done three things that make you feel good about yourself. This is slightly different than above. For example, I don't feel bad about myself when I don't bake bread, but I do feel GOOD about myself when my kids are eating homemade bread. Depending on your personality, several things from above may fit in this category too, like exercise, or getting dressed for the day.
3) Write down three things that drive you absolutely nuts. When you come in the house from being gone, what is your eye drawn to? The unswept floor? Dirty dishes? Unclean sheets on the bed? Whatever those things are that you feel absolutely compelled to do, write those down.
4) Write down three things that are important to your spouse. What few things are truly essential to them? Make a special effort to accomplish those things, even if they don't resonate with you. In turn, your spouse should make an effort to give you special grace to NOT do everything when you are overwhelmed. (I know this is basic marriage stuff, but I also know that bringing some intentionality to this conversation can help with friction and hurt feelings in the future).
These are the 12 things that you are going to work hard to get done. Everything that is NOT one of these 12 can be let go. Really. That doesn't mean that the things you let go aren't good and worthwhile things! That's what makes it so hard....they usually are! But you are not able right now. No, no, you're not. If you have extra energy and are feeling great one day, feel free to add on. But otherwise, if it's not on the list, it doesn't get done. Toddler soccer isn't in your top 12? You are not going. Next year may be better. But for now, it is not a top priority.
If you are extra overwhelmed, put only one item on each list. Time will pass, things will change, and it will feel easier. Then you add more back.
Next, you need good systems in place for everything you do. Systems and habits allow us to run on autopilot and be successful, even when things are crazy. If you are a personality type like some of us (#oldestchildren), this is probably a no-brainer. But I've noticed for many mamas, this is a struggle.
If an activity or some period of time every day feels hard, that is just a signal to you that it needs your focused attention. For example, it does not need to feel incredibly difficult to get out of the house on time everyday. It's never going to be fun, but it shouldn't feel impossible. If you are late everyday, create some systems that make it easier to be on time. Walk back your schedule from the time you need to arrive, and make sure you build in cushion for the inevitable emergencies that come with having kids. Commit to packing the baby's bag the night before, or restock it as soon as you return from an outing, so that it is always stocked and ready to go. Have a car bag with outfits, toys, formula, a bottle, water, and other supplies that just stays in the car. Shower and pick out clothes the night before. Make breakfast casserole at night. Whatever steps it takes so that you can be more efficient, commit to those habits.
Let's talk about how you can get help with things that do need to be done. Many of you who read here are married with children. If that is you, your spouse can be your #1 support. Even if they travel for work frequently, there are always things they can do to make your day easier. Brainstorm together: what can they take off your plate? Someone who is traveling may be able to make those nagging phone calls for you, like to the insurance agent or water company (heck, it's quieter at an airport gate than at my house most days. Why not?!) Maybe they can help you automate the bills, so that you don't need to think about them.
If they are not traveling, now is the time to figure out a new way to delegate the work. When you are drowning, for whatever reason, they should be a key player in your family's upkeep. (New things my husband does that he didn't always: unload dishwasher, wash random extra dishes in the morning, carry laundry, make breakfast for the kids, pack lunches on homeschool coop days, occasionally take a kid to a doctor's appointment, take toddlers and preschoolers to work with him in the tractor when I have an event for the older kids...hold on, I know there's more....) In any case, your spouse may recognize that you are overwhelmed, but not the need to step up their help, so consider having a calm conversation about your needs. (I mentally call these little talks "state of the union" conversations, because they are useful to have at least once a year).
How else can you get help? Maybe you have older kids who could be pitching in more. Maybe you have family who lives close by and could be a real support. I know several families whose mama or MIL takes the kids for a set period every week. If that would be helpful to you, ASK! What about friends or your church family? Is there a way you could exchange work or take turns with kiddos in some way that would give you breathing room? Be creative. I know people who do a "friends' summer camp". Every Friday during the summer, they take turns having all the kids at their house all day, but then they get the next three Fridays off, while their kids are at another family's turn for camp.
If you are covered in tiny babies and you just can't see giving them to other people for any period of time (I've been there), what else can you delegate? Look for something that doesn't need YOU, just an adult to do it. Being a mama? Only you can do that. Nursing a baby? You again. Housework? Anyone with a pulse.
I know a few people whose mama folds their laundry. If that option is available to you, take it! If not (right here!), can you hire help? I know sometimes it seems uncomfortable to pay someone to do housework, but that has been a lifesaver for our family for the last six or so years. This was essential to me during all my pregnancies especially, when I just could NOT deal with being sick, and staring at a bathroom that hasn't been cleaned properly in months. I have a sweet lady, Danielle, (who has become a friend) who cleans my house once a week, and I just recently began to give her hours folding and putting away our laundry as well.
What about meals? I have a friend who just started a business selling her homemade bread. I love baking bread, but my kids eat it way too quickly for me to keep up, and it had fallen off my plate of priorities in the last two years since beginning my own business. Still, it bugged me to buy less-healthy bread at the store. Now I have the win-win of supporting another mama in making a little income, and my kids being fed nutritious homemade bread that I am not having to find time to bake. You could use more frozen meals. You could pay a teenager to take care of the yard. If money can solve a problem for you, DO IT. I would give up most everything before I gave up my Danielle, because it is such a blessing to me to KNOW that something will be done properly without me doing it. Really think through what you can delegate.
Finally, do whatever you can to find the fun in small ways. You may feel stuck right now, but you can still improve your day little by little. Have your go-to motivation song ready on your phone every morning. Buy yourself a decent bottle of wine on Friday nights. Instead of crying in the kitchen when you are losing your mind, turn the music up loud and have a dance party with your kids. (This will freak them out at first, but they quickly start to love it). Always have something to look forward to-manufacture it if you have to. Buy yourself a new audio book for the car. Reward yourself whenever you can. But above all, GIVE YOURSELF GRACE. No guilt allowed. You are doing the best you can. GRACE GRACE GRACE. When you can do more, you will do more. For now, hang on tight. As a mama to a lot of babies in a short period of time, I promise you seasons pass quickly. Five years will fly by without you really noticing, and you will look up and realize that it has gotten easier.
What are your best survival tips?
Prioritize
An essential beginning step for me, for feeling more in control, is to think through and prioritize what needs to be done. One defining feature of survival mode is that you CANNOT do every single thing that is on your plate. It is absolutely inevitable that things are going to fall off the plate-the key is that YOU choose which things get dropped, instead of allowing life to make random determinations. Over the years, I have figured out an easy way to help me define my priorities during crazy times:
1) Write down three things that make me feel bad about myself or my house or my family when they are not done. These might be things like a healthy dinner, clean laundry, a swept floor, a good school day, church attendance, my workout....anything that will nag at you and make you feel ugh about yourself.
2) Write done three things that make you feel good about yourself. This is slightly different than above. For example, I don't feel bad about myself when I don't bake bread, but I do feel GOOD about myself when my kids are eating homemade bread. Depending on your personality, several things from above may fit in this category too, like exercise, or getting dressed for the day.
3) Write down three things that drive you absolutely nuts. When you come in the house from being gone, what is your eye drawn to? The unswept floor? Dirty dishes? Unclean sheets on the bed? Whatever those things are that you feel absolutely compelled to do, write those down.
4) Write down three things that are important to your spouse. What few things are truly essential to them? Make a special effort to accomplish those things, even if they don't resonate with you. In turn, your spouse should make an effort to give you special grace to NOT do everything when you are overwhelmed. (I know this is basic marriage stuff, but I also know that bringing some intentionality to this conversation can help with friction and hurt feelings in the future).
These are the 12 things that you are going to work hard to get done. Everything that is NOT one of these 12 can be let go. Really. That doesn't mean that the things you let go aren't good and worthwhile things! That's what makes it so hard....they usually are! But you are not able right now. No, no, you're not. If you have extra energy and are feeling great one day, feel free to add on. But otherwise, if it's not on the list, it doesn't get done. Toddler soccer isn't in your top 12? You are not going. Next year may be better. But for now, it is not a top priority.
If you are extra overwhelmed, put only one item on each list. Time will pass, things will change, and it will feel easier. Then you add more back.
Put Systems in Place
Next, you need good systems in place for everything you do. Systems and habits allow us to run on autopilot and be successful, even when things are crazy. If you are a personality type like some of us (#oldestchildren), this is probably a no-brainer. But I've noticed for many mamas, this is a struggle.
If an activity or some period of time every day feels hard, that is just a signal to you that it needs your focused attention. For example, it does not need to feel incredibly difficult to get out of the house on time everyday. It's never going to be fun, but it shouldn't feel impossible. If you are late everyday, create some systems that make it easier to be on time. Walk back your schedule from the time you need to arrive, and make sure you build in cushion for the inevitable emergencies that come with having kids. Commit to packing the baby's bag the night before, or restock it as soon as you return from an outing, so that it is always stocked and ready to go. Have a car bag with outfits, toys, formula, a bottle, water, and other supplies that just stays in the car. Shower and pick out clothes the night before. Make breakfast casserole at night. Whatever steps it takes so that you can be more efficient, commit to those habits.
If the hours between 4-7pm are hellish everyday, that is not a reflection of your character. It is just a red flag that you need some systems in place. Maybe you need to meal plan (blah blah blah, I know). Maybe you need to STOP meal planning. Frankly, I don't make new recipes often anymore, and I don't meal plan. Every week, I buy ingredients to several meals that I know my family enjoys, and I make whatever I have time for that day. And it is LESS stressful than meal planning for me right now. Maybe making crockpot or freezer meals on Sunday would help (#sundayprepforlife). Or maybe you don't need to cook much at all-if your husband is away often, and you just have toddlers at home, why not have the cheese and crackers and veggies and dip meal that they prefer anyway, especially if you are just as happy with a salad yourself. Cook up a bunch of chicken breasts on one night, and happily eat that all week.
Let Things Go
On that note, what can you let go? Seriously. I know you're thinking "nothing, for real, that's why I'm overwhelmed lady!", but be flexible with yourself. The list of things that I do NOT do is so much longer than things I get done. Intentionally. (Come back on Friday for an update of this post).
This is a stupid example, but I grew up never eating off a paper plate, ever. Not even once. Never at my parents' parties, bbqs, picnics. Never. So it didn't occur to me in a house with 7 people that it might save me some time to use disposable plates. And then when it did occur to me, I was horrified by the idea because it seemed wasteful, I had my mother's voice in my head, etc. DUMB. Let it all go! Your sanity is not less important than the cranky voice of judgment that lives in your head.
What else can you give up? Baths every night for babies, that's what. You have my pediatricians' permission (every doctor I've ever had has suggested this). It is bad for their skin. Twice a week in the winter, at max. There's an hour per week saved, at least.
You know what else? Toddler extracurricular activities. Yes, seriously. Here's a secret: I drove myself absolutely nuts making sure that my oldest daughter had fun dance classes and story hour and activities when she was three and four. I sat in the lobby for an hour every time, with another toddler, and infant, and morning sickness. It felt HARD. She enjoyed those activities very much. But you know what? She doesn't remember a stinking thing about it. At all. She is (almost) eleven, and she can't remember even having a dance class. If you are going crazy, if you are exhausted, if you are barely holding it together, DON'T GO. YOU ARE THE MAMA. Nothing bad will happen. I promise. (Well, that is a lie. The three year old-especially an oldest child-will throw a fit about missing a class, but she will be quickly distracted with a yay!-picnic-dinner idea).
Corralling all five kids at church by yourself makes you stabby? Buh-bye sanctuary! See ya in a few months! Get your Jesus at home with awesome online sermons, guilt-free. STOP DOING EVERYTHING. I know we all have this picture in our minds of our ideal selves, working at full capacity, being amazing. I believe in my heart that you were created to be amazing. But you don't need to do every single flipping thing, especially in times of survival mode.
How about this? Stop folding laundry. Folding and putting away laundry is among the most Sisyphean things we do, right? So stop. Clean laundry in one basket, dirty in the other. Easy. Every morning, pick you clean laundry from the basket, instead of a drawer. (Half of you are like "duh", and the other half are horrified by this idea. I'll let you guess how I grew up).
This is a stupid example, but I grew up never eating off a paper plate, ever. Not even once. Never at my parents' parties, bbqs, picnics. Never. So it didn't occur to me in a house with 7 people that it might save me some time to use disposable plates. And then when it did occur to me, I was horrified by the idea because it seemed wasteful, I had my mother's voice in my head, etc. DUMB. Let it all go! Your sanity is not less important than the cranky voice of judgment that lives in your head.
What else can you give up? Baths every night for babies, that's what. You have my pediatricians' permission (every doctor I've ever had has suggested this). It is bad for their skin. Twice a week in the winter, at max. There's an hour per week saved, at least.
You know what else? Toddler extracurricular activities. Yes, seriously. Here's a secret: I drove myself absolutely nuts making sure that my oldest daughter had fun dance classes and story hour and activities when she was three and four. I sat in the lobby for an hour every time, with another toddler, and infant, and morning sickness. It felt HARD. She enjoyed those activities very much. But you know what? She doesn't remember a stinking thing about it. At all. She is (almost) eleven, and she can't remember even having a dance class. If you are going crazy, if you are exhausted, if you are barely holding it together, DON'T GO. YOU ARE THE MAMA. Nothing bad will happen. I promise. (Well, that is a lie. The three year old-especially an oldest child-will throw a fit about missing a class, but she will be quickly distracted with a yay!-picnic-dinner idea).
Corralling all five kids at church by yourself makes you stabby? Buh-bye sanctuary! See ya in a few months! Get your Jesus at home with awesome online sermons, guilt-free. STOP DOING EVERYTHING. I know we all have this picture in our minds of our ideal selves, working at full capacity, being amazing. I believe in my heart that you were created to be amazing. But you don't need to do every single flipping thing, especially in times of survival mode.
How about this? Stop folding laundry. Folding and putting away laundry is among the most Sisyphean things we do, right? So stop. Clean laundry in one basket, dirty in the other. Easy. Every morning, pick you clean laundry from the basket, instead of a drawer. (Half of you are like "duh", and the other half are horrified by this idea. I'll let you guess how I grew up).
Get Help and Delegate
Let's talk about how you can get help with things that do need to be done. Many of you who read here are married with children. If that is you, your spouse can be your #1 support. Even if they travel for work frequently, there are always things they can do to make your day easier. Brainstorm together: what can they take off your plate? Someone who is traveling may be able to make those nagging phone calls for you, like to the insurance agent or water company (heck, it's quieter at an airport gate than at my house most days. Why not?!) Maybe they can help you automate the bills, so that you don't need to think about them.
If they are not traveling, now is the time to figure out a new way to delegate the work. When you are drowning, for whatever reason, they should be a key player in your family's upkeep. (New things my husband does that he didn't always: unload dishwasher, wash random extra dishes in the morning, carry laundry, make breakfast for the kids, pack lunches on homeschool coop days, occasionally take a kid to a doctor's appointment, take toddlers and preschoolers to work with him in the tractor when I have an event for the older kids...hold on, I know there's more....) In any case, your spouse may recognize that you are overwhelmed, but not the need to step up their help, so consider having a calm conversation about your needs. (I mentally call these little talks "state of the union" conversations, because they are useful to have at least once a year).
How else can you get help? Maybe you have older kids who could be pitching in more. Maybe you have family who lives close by and could be a real support. I know several families whose mama or MIL takes the kids for a set period every week. If that would be helpful to you, ASK! What about friends or your church family? Is there a way you could exchange work or take turns with kiddos in some way that would give you breathing room? Be creative. I know people who do a "friends' summer camp". Every Friday during the summer, they take turns having all the kids at their house all day, but then they get the next three Fridays off, while their kids are at another family's turn for camp.
If you are covered in tiny babies and you just can't see giving them to other people for any period of time (I've been there), what else can you delegate? Look for something that doesn't need YOU, just an adult to do it. Being a mama? Only you can do that. Nursing a baby? You again. Housework? Anyone with a pulse.
I know a few people whose mama folds their laundry. If that option is available to you, take it! If not (right here!), can you hire help? I know sometimes it seems uncomfortable to pay someone to do housework, but that has been a lifesaver for our family for the last six or so years. This was essential to me during all my pregnancies especially, when I just could NOT deal with being sick, and staring at a bathroom that hasn't been cleaned properly in months. I have a sweet lady, Danielle, (who has become a friend) who cleans my house once a week, and I just recently began to give her hours folding and putting away our laundry as well.
What about meals? I have a friend who just started a business selling her homemade bread. I love baking bread, but my kids eat it way too quickly for me to keep up, and it had fallen off my plate of priorities in the last two years since beginning my own business. Still, it bugged me to buy less-healthy bread at the store. Now I have the win-win of supporting another mama in making a little income, and my kids being fed nutritious homemade bread that I am not having to find time to bake. You could use more frozen meals. You could pay a teenager to take care of the yard. If money can solve a problem for you, DO IT. I would give up most everything before I gave up my Danielle, because it is such a blessing to me to KNOW that something will be done properly without me doing it. Really think through what you can delegate.
Find the Fun
Finally, do whatever you can to find the fun in small ways. You may feel stuck right now, but you can still improve your day little by little. Have your go-to motivation song ready on your phone every morning. Buy yourself a decent bottle of wine on Friday nights. Instead of crying in the kitchen when you are losing your mind, turn the music up loud and have a dance party with your kids. (This will freak them out at first, but they quickly start to love it). Always have something to look forward to-manufacture it if you have to. Buy yourself a new audio book for the car. Reward yourself whenever you can. But above all, GIVE YOURSELF GRACE. No guilt allowed. You are doing the best you can. GRACE GRACE GRACE. When you can do more, you will do more. For now, hang on tight. As a mama to a lot of babies in a short period of time, I promise you seasons pass quickly. Five years will fly by without you really noticing, and you will look up and realize that it has gotten easier.
"Courage, dear heart."
-C.S. Lewis
What are your best survival tips?
What keeps you going when things feel crazy?
Friday, May 6, 2016
On Being a Mama
Oh my friends, I am blessed to be surrounded on all sides by so many truly incredible women (you!). I see you working so hard, sacrificing, hanging on by the skin of your teeth, nailing a smile on your face when you are exhausted, and still truly enjoying the sweet little faces that you have been entrusted with everyday. I pray that you know are doing a great work, one that will ripple into future for longer than you know.
With Mother's Day coming up, I went and read back through some of my old posts about motherhood. I wouldn't say that all the circumstances from these posts remain the same, but the emotions hold true. I hope you enjoy a little reflection too.
With Mother's Day coming up, I went and read back through some of my old posts about motherhood. I wouldn't say that all the circumstances from these posts remain the same, but the emotions hold true. I hope you enjoy a little reflection too.
Despite what I said in the Expectations post above, my wish for you is a relaxing and joyful Mother's Day. You truly deserve to be celebrated.
Monday, April 11, 2016
A Year in the Making: How Arbonne Taught Me to Live Inspired
Hello faithful friends! I apologize for being inconsistent with this space in the last year or so. So many exciting things have happened in that time that took my time and attention, but I have missed chatting with you all. I am committed to making the room for this in my life again.
In the meantime, let's catch up! As I alluded to above, it has been a surprising and fun couple of years. First of all, my family is healthy and well, and growing up quickly. Those babies are now almost 11, almost nine, seven, five, and three. Not exactly babies anymore. I am everyday both delighted and exhausted by all their energy and passion for life. There are a lot of feelings and talking and NOISE in this tiny house. We are still happily homeschooling, so I feel blessed that we get to spend all our days together. In addition to farming, Seth has started another business of his own doing sales and service for precision planting. His business is absolutely exploding at this time of year, right before planting season.
The biggest surprise of these years has been my Arbonne business. When I started a little less than two years ago, I was just terrified. I thought there was no way that a business like this could work. I thought that I had absolutely no time to fit anything else into my life, let alone my own business. I thought that I couldn't be successful at a network marketing business, because I didn't know anyone here.
Well. I have never been happier to be wrong in my whole life. Ten months after beginning my business with all that fear, I promoted to Vice President and earned a free Mercedes. In the past two years, my business partners and I have been able to build an incredible team of people across about twenty states and three countries, people who motivate and inspire me everyday, and who have achieved considerable success themselves. In our first full year of business, my team did almost a million dollars in sales, and we promoted 22 people to the position where they make $1000+ per month. We promoted five people to the level where they make $2500+ per month, and this year, we are ready to help three more women earn their own free Mercedes before 2016 ends. My personal business now brings home six figures a year.
More than that, we have been able to give back in big ways. We have been delighted to support many causes that you told me are important to you (March of Dimes, St. Baldrick's, Girls on the Run, Boys and Girls Club, Volunteers of America, and several smaller local needs). But the biggest success of this year is the tiny part we played in supporting the Hope for Haiti project. Last month, the Arbonne VPs leading that project had an idea for a FB auction of gently used clothes and accessories. We hoped the auction could raise $40,000. We raised $300,000 in four days and CLOSED DOWN the project. As a result of that vision and the work of so many, all 90 families who were still homeless from the 2010 earthquake now will have homes. A few weeks later, the ground has already been broken for their houses.
I cannot explain the surprise and blessing of this, except that so many people have been incredibly generous, have consistently worked hard, and have dreamed much bigger than seems realistic. THANK YOU, for the part that each of you has played in supporting my business. So many of you have hosted small groups for me, referred me to other successful business people, and introduced me to your contacts. Thank you for those of you who have loyally purchased products, written me glowing reviews, and joined my team. I cannot tell you what it means to me to have your continued support as my little business grows.
When I started my Arbonne business, I thought that I wanted to help Seth pay off my law school loans. As it turns out, I am not motivated by that goal at all. But it did lead me to my passion-helping people find a third career path. Many of us were taught that if you work hard and do well in school, go to college and go to grad school, then you will get a great job and be successful. Well, for the most part, that turned out to be true. Except that we were working more and more and more hours. And we had a bunch of grad school debt. And then we had babies, and we found that we didn't want to work more than full-time and not see their sweet faces all week long. But what were the options?
I know many women in that position who eventually decided to become stay at home mamas, as I did. While I have loved being home full-time for almost 10 years now, I always felt a tug to be using a different part of my brain. But I truly believed there was no other option (that would allow me to keep time with my family first) between working out of the home, and being a stay at home mom.
Arbonne IS that third path. I am now able to run a thriving business, while still being at home every day, educating and raising my kiddos. You can only imagine my surprise-before I began with Arbonne, I seriously believed that people who had direct sales businesses were sad and lonely people, who spent far more money with their silly companies than they earned. (Sorry sorry sorry! I really did think that!). Helping people on this third path to career success is now my passion. It is what gets me moving early everyday, and keeps me up late at night! I have never felt as fulfilled and inspired as I do now, and I am able to have my business work around my first love, my family.
Now that you have been very lengthily updated, where do we go from here? :)
Well, as promised, I am going to be more consistent with this space. Sharing ideas and conversation is a deep-rooted joy of mine, and I am going to make time to do that with you more.
There will also be a small shift in the conversation here-in the past, I have written mostly about babies and home and farming, and I will continue to do that. Those are as essential to my life as they have ever been. But Arbonne has also opened up a whole new group of passions for me, namely: healthy living, skincare and makeup, goal-setting and entrepreneurship, and even fashion. So you will begin to see a small sprinkling of these topics as well. I am hoping to bring you tasty (and group-tested!) clean eating recipes, makeup and skincare reviews, and a peek inside my business life.
I hope you will continue to stick with me and enjoy a broader range of topics here. If you like what you read, can I ask you to share this page, as you have done so many times in the past? You can also follow me on Facebook, Instagram (@sodellwenzel), or Pinterest to hear more antics from our house everyday!
And of course, I always love hearing from you in the comments! Tell me, what is the biggest, most exciting thing that has happened to YOU in the past year? I am anxious to hear...
In the meantime, let's catch up! As I alluded to above, it has been a surprising and fun couple of years. First of all, my family is healthy and well, and growing up quickly. Those babies are now almost 11, almost nine, seven, five, and three. Not exactly babies anymore. I am everyday both delighted and exhausted by all their energy and passion for life. There are a lot of feelings and talking and NOISE in this tiny house. We are still happily homeschooling, so I feel blessed that we get to spend all our days together. In addition to farming, Seth has started another business of his own doing sales and service for precision planting. His business is absolutely exploding at this time of year, right before planting season.
 |
| Olivia, 10. Amelia, 8. Charlotte, 7. Henry, 5. Griffin, 3. |
The biggest surprise of these years has been my Arbonne business. When I started a little less than two years ago, I was just terrified. I thought there was no way that a business like this could work. I thought that I had absolutely no time to fit anything else into my life, let alone my own business. I thought that I couldn't be successful at a network marketing business, because I didn't know anyone here.
Well. I have never been happier to be wrong in my whole life. Ten months after beginning my business with all that fear, I promoted to Vice President and earned a free Mercedes. In the past two years, my business partners and I have been able to build an incredible team of people across about twenty states and three countries, people who motivate and inspire me everyday, and who have achieved considerable success themselves. In our first full year of business, my team did almost a million dollars in sales, and we promoted 22 people to the position where they make $1000+ per month. We promoted five people to the level where they make $2500+ per month, and this year, we are ready to help three more women earn their own free Mercedes before 2016 ends. My personal business now brings home six figures a year.
More than that, we have been able to give back in big ways. We have been delighted to support many causes that you told me are important to you (March of Dimes, St. Baldrick's, Girls on the Run, Boys and Girls Club, Volunteers of America, and several smaller local needs). But the biggest success of this year is the tiny part we played in supporting the Hope for Haiti project. Last month, the Arbonne VPs leading that project had an idea for a FB auction of gently used clothes and accessories. We hoped the auction could raise $40,000. We raised $300,000 in four days and CLOSED DOWN the project. As a result of that vision and the work of so many, all 90 families who were still homeless from the 2010 earthquake now will have homes. A few weeks later, the ground has already been broken for their houses.
I cannot explain the surprise and blessing of this, except that so many people have been incredibly generous, have consistently worked hard, and have dreamed much bigger than seems realistic. THANK YOU, for the part that each of you has played in supporting my business. So many of you have hosted small groups for me, referred me to other successful business people, and introduced me to your contacts. Thank you for those of you who have loyally purchased products, written me glowing reviews, and joined my team. I cannot tell you what it means to me to have your continued support as my little business grows.
 |
| Just a little Arbonne fun from the past two years |
I know many women in that position who eventually decided to become stay at home mamas, as I did. While I have loved being home full-time for almost 10 years now, I always felt a tug to be using a different part of my brain. But I truly believed there was no other option (that would allow me to keep time with my family first) between working out of the home, and being a stay at home mom.
Arbonne IS that third path. I am now able to run a thriving business, while still being at home every day, educating and raising my kiddos. You can only imagine my surprise-before I began with Arbonne, I seriously believed that people who had direct sales businesses were sad and lonely people, who spent far more money with their silly companies than they earned. (Sorry sorry sorry! I really did think that!). Helping people on this third path to career success is now my passion. It is what gets me moving early everyday, and keeps me up late at night! I have never felt as fulfilled and inspired as I do now, and I am able to have my business work around my first love, my family.
 |
| Mercedes Presentation Party, May 2015 |
Well, as promised, I am going to be more consistent with this space. Sharing ideas and conversation is a deep-rooted joy of mine, and I am going to make time to do that with you more.
There will also be a small shift in the conversation here-in the past, I have written mostly about babies and home and farming, and I will continue to do that. Those are as essential to my life as they have ever been. But Arbonne has also opened up a whole new group of passions for me, namely: healthy living, skincare and makeup, goal-setting and entrepreneurship, and even fashion. So you will begin to see a small sprinkling of these topics as well. I am hoping to bring you tasty (and group-tested!) clean eating recipes, makeup and skincare reviews, and a peek inside my business life.
I hope you will continue to stick with me and enjoy a broader range of topics here. If you like what you read, can I ask you to share this page, as you have done so many times in the past? You can also follow me on Facebook, Instagram (@sodellwenzel), or Pinterest to hear more antics from our house everyday!
And of course, I always love hearing from you in the comments! Tell me, what is the biggest, most exciting thing that has happened to YOU in the past year? I am anxious to hear...
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
First Day of School 2011
We started school last Monday, so summer is over for us.... but we KILLED it this year.
We still want to cross off a few more fun plans, but we actually did accomplish most of what we had wanted to when we made the list in May. I highly suggest writing it down! We are going to make a fall bucket list soon.
We have a few not-back-to-school traditions around here:
Mama starts getting up early again...(no picture at 5:30, but trust me, I looked like merry sunshine)
New school supplies (maybe my favorite thing ever)...
Dessert for breakfast...
And of course, pictures on the back step...
School Room Reality
Listen, I love looking at gorgeous school rooms as much as the next girl. And they really are inspirational, aren't they? (Have you seen Sara's? How about Ann's? Or OMSH's? And yes, I have stolen ideas from all of these).
But over here in the reality of we-live-in-an-old-farmhouse, we don't have an extra room to reserve just for school, as much as I would LOVE that. I think most homeschool moms have kids who do school at the kitchen table, right?. My table was in the picture above with the new pencils. And I do love it. Here are some other little things in my school-house that we love:
So that is the grand tour of little changes we've made to the house since last year. Nothing major, but we are always tinkering around.
Have I told you lately how much I love these girls?!
I didn't know if you knew, so I'm taking this chance to say, that I had the best day with you, today.
Taylor Swift
 |
| Summer Bucket List |
We have a few not-back-to-school traditions around here:
Mama starts getting up early again...(no picture at 5:30, but trust me, I looked like merry sunshine)
New school supplies (maybe my favorite thing ever)...
Dessert for breakfast...
 |
| Early morning cherry pie |
And of course, pictures on the back step...
 |
| Poor girl has allergies like nobody's business right now. She really is happy about school, I promise. |
School Room Reality
Listen, I love looking at gorgeous school rooms as much as the next girl. And they really are inspirational, aren't they? (Have you seen Sara's? How about Ann's? Or OMSH's? And yes, I have stolen ideas from all of these).
But over here in the reality of we-live-in-an-old-farmhouse, we don't have an extra room to reserve just for school, as much as I would LOVE that. I think most homeschool moms have kids who do school at the kitchen table, right?. My table was in the picture above with the new pencils. And I do love it. Here are some other little things in my school-house that we love:
 |
| Reading nook in playroom? Idea stolen, natch. |
 |
| Beginnings of a gallery wall in living room |
 |
| Coffee table repurposed as a kid desk area |
 |
| Reminders for the teacher. Er, I meant students. |
 |
| Back to school gift from Grandma's garden |
 |
| Dining room photo wall |
So that is the grand tour of little changes we've made to the house since last year. Nothing major, but we are always tinkering around.
Have I told you lately how much I love these girls?!
I didn't know if you knew, so I'm taking this chance to say, that I had the best day with you, today.
Taylor Swift
Monday, August 29, 2011
City Girl Goes Fishing
Grandpa Brian has a fishing pond back behind some fields. Needless to say, all the grandkids absolutely love it. (Remember what I said about Seth's parents working hard to make opportunities for family fun? Exactly!) I wasn't lucky enough to go last summer, being pregnant and all (ahem), so this was my first time. Honestly, this was probably my second or third time fishing EVER. I know. I was a deprived child. (Kidding, kidding).
Anyway, I was lucky enough to have my friend Lindsey, a born and raised country girl, with me to show me how it's done. We just love Mike and Lindsey and their family.
My sister Indira was also spending some time with us, so we had eight kids under 8 (and only four adults) at first. None of the kids remembered how to bait and cast, if they had ever learned. It was a madhouse. We were very, very grateful when both sets of grandparents showed up to help.
Each of the kiddos, even our two year olds, caught fish. The fish were pretty much jumping right out of the pond and onto the hooks.
I took many, many pictures. Of course.
School has started again for pretty much everyone around here this week. We're starting up today. I hope you guys enjoy the end of the summer. It feels like fall already, doesn't it?
Anyway, I was lucky enough to have my friend Lindsey, a born and raised country girl, with me to show me how it's done. We just love Mike and Lindsey and their family.
My sister Indira was also spending some time with us, so we had eight kids under 8 (and only four adults) at first. None of the kids remembered how to bait and cast, if they had ever learned. It was a madhouse. We were very, very grateful when both sets of grandparents showed up to help.
Each of the kiddos, even our two year olds, caught fish. The fish were pretty much jumping right out of the pond and onto the hooks.
I took many, many pictures. Of course.
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| Daddy brings home the bait |
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| This is deeply fascinating. |
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| Jace |
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| Seth and Olivia |
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| Charlotte was not going to let anyone stop her. |
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| Jace's first catch, of probably 25 |
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| Lindsey and Peyton |
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| Toddler fish |
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| Mike and Jace |
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| Indira |
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| Grandma and Hen |
School has started again for pretty much everyone around here this week. We're starting up today. I hope you guys enjoy the end of the summer. It feels like fall already, doesn't it?
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