Monday, February 13, 2012

The Best Day of the Year...Not.

Exactly right.

Seriously though...if Valentine's Day is your favorite holiday and you are, right this very minute, getting yourself all cranked up about gifts and outfits and date night, go here and read. 

Everybody back?  Remember that post?  The same thing is true of Valentine's Day.  Even more true, probably.  When you are single, Valentine's Day is an easy day to get a little depressed.  And when you are married, it is an easy day to get a little depressed.  Is it fun for anyone, really?  No?! 

Seth and I haven't done V-Day since college (not that I dislike gifts and flowers or date night.  No.  Frankly, those are some of my favorite things.)  Around here, we decided that it's a kid's holiday.  And you know what?  I don't miss it.  At all.  The kids are naturally thrilled with all things hearts and pink and candy, so everybody wins.  We usually play a "heart attack" game where everybody writes one thing they love about each member of our family on a heart, and we hang them up all month.  This is my favorite part, truly.  I always save them after I take them down, because the things that the kids say about each other are hilarious.  Er, I mean...priceless and kind and loving, of course.

Heart Attack 2010 (mysteriously no pictures can be found of 2011):

Because, the thing is, this is the kind of love I want in my life anyway.  Not that there's anything wrong with roses and chocolate.  Just that there is something more genuine that I want to be focused on.  And I hope I see and show that kind of love in my life everyday, not just one day of the year....the same day that everybody else in the world is trying to get a sitter and go out for an overpriced dinner too.

I'm not saying that it is wrong to celebrate Valentine's Day, if that is what makes you both happy!  Have at it!  However, if it isn't making you both happy, maybe take a break this year.  The thing about Valentine's Day is that it always come back around the next year.

Fair warning, this is the ishy-squishy part of Valentine's for my farmer.  Look away now if you are squeamish.  Or my Daddy.  (I'm adding in totally gratuitous wedding pictures below.  Because I can).

Here is a list of ways that I see my husband loving me that have nothing to do with a holiday, and everything to do with everyday:

He puts our family first, always.  He puts his own needs second, always.  And I don't even see him struggle to do so, darn it.

He goes to work, everyday, and then comes home and gets on the floor with the kids.  Everyday.

That paycheck he brings home from work?  Most months, not even a dollar of it is spent on something for himself.

Similarly, in the same period of time during which I bought three random jackets/coats/fleeces/capes/etc for myself, he wore a ten year old winter coat, to the point of falling apart, literally.  And he protested that he didn't need a new one this year when I insisted.

He takes everything I say and do in the best possible light.  He sees my best self, even when I am not that person.  Let me tell you how often that is: every day.

He tells me how sexy I am  And let's be honest...I'm not exactly the girl I was pre-kids.  So he's either blind, or he sees me with love.  Probably both.

He brings my girls home flowers on special occasions, but always little-girl-appropriate flowers.  He saves grown-up flowers for me.

He thanks me for making dinner every single night.  Seriously, even though I told him to stop.  He says that he gets to eat it everyday, so he is going to thank me everyday.

When I get crabby, he suggests that I go upstairs and do something relaxing.  When he gets crabby...well....I'm not always so generous.

He always encourages me.  If he sees me doing something wrong, he brings me around to the idea gently instead of criticizing me.

He's totally on board for most of my crazy ideas.

He respects his mama and tries to do helpful things for her without being asked.  (If you're not married yet, trust me when I tell you that how he treats his mother, all things being equal, is very similar to how he will eventually treat you).

He cleans the kitchen after we have people over, even though I give up and go to bed.

He lets me pick out his clothes.

He makes sure we are on the same page about big decisions.  He takes my opinion as seriously as his own.

He gets up with our babies at night.

I've even convinced him to wear our babies in my pink silk sling.  He only did it a few times, but he didn't complain.

He makes me laugh.

My husband is my very favorite person.

I'll stop now because he is probably dying of embarrassment.  I love you honey!  Thanks for picking me!  I'm not kidding about that bacon.