Our yard, spring 2011 |
But sometimes they just don't think.....(No, I'm not talking about myself. Of course not. I never have foot-in-the-mouth syndrome. Stop laughing.)
Here's just a little taste of things I've heard lately, and I only have four kiddos. I don't know how you girls with six or ten kids do it, but I hope to find out for myself one day.... :)
It just cracks me up to watch people when we come into a store or restaurant. Is having four kids so crazy?! Apparently, yes. For the record, I am not offended, just amused (well, mostly).
Here we go!
* Don't tell me that you would kill yourself/scratch your eyes out/want to die if you had four kids. Especially in front of the kids.
* Please stop saying "Now you finally got your boy and you can stop having babies." Some of us LIKE having babies. We are doing it on purpose. (Well, not the first one, but that is a different story).
* On that same note, don't ask whether we have so many kids because we were trying for a boy. NO. We would have been thrilled with all girls. Yes, Seth too. Really.
* Stop saying that we are going to have an awful time when they are all teenagers. Most of the teenagers I know are pretty amazing. I'll take my chances.
* No, I did not have all super easy pregnancies or deliveries and that's why we have so many kids. I'll spare you the details this time, but if you keep asking, I'd be happy to launch into things that would make you blush. I have four kids. Nothing embarrasses me. I have no dignity about my baby parts left.
Henry, 5 months |
* Nope, I am not that patient of a person, by nature. You know how you get better at something? Practice. You know how you get to practice patience? Children.
*You would go crazy with nothing to do all day if you didn't work?! Trust me, it's a lot more of a haven't-sat-down-in-12-hours-type situation. I had a lot more time on my hands back when we had a nanny.
*Similarly, if you could never homeschool because your kids drive you nuts and so you can't wait for their vacations to be over so that they leave you alone, you know who to look to, right? Oh, it's the school's fault? Okay then.
*Yes, they're all mine. Yes, they're all my husband's.
*No, we're not done yet. Or maybe we are. Who knows?
*No, we don't belong to a faith that has a "quiverfull" mentality (but frankly, I haven't asked, so I could be wrong).
*Yup, I finished high school. And college too. I am, however, a law school dropout. No, I didn't take the Bar. Yes, I did work. Yes, that is giving up a lot of income.
Children's Dedication at Church |
* My husband isn't "making" me have these babies. Seriously.
*Nope, we're not rich. Really. Trust me. But my husband does work very hard so that I can stay home!
*Staring isn't nice either.
(Now, if you're sitting there and thinking you have said one of those things to me, don't worry! I am only talking about when strangers ask this stuff).
I know some people suggest coming up with some kind of snappy reply, but I don't think that is particularly helpful. Mostly, it is just so unusual to see larger families anymore that people are curious and want to comment. I truly don't believe that most people mean to be negative. I usually try to say something like "Yes, we've been very blessed!" because it seems like people don't realize that we DO consider our children blessings, not burdens. We are grateful for these babies everyday! I hope some of the people who make negative comments see our joy, and maybe think about children in a different way. (Well, just well-behaved children. Those brats on the playground are on their own). But more than that, I want our children to hear that we consider them blessings, no matter what crazy-eyes-lady in the Applebees just said.
The two other things I hear most often are "You have your hands full" and "You must be a busy lady". Yes and yes. Neither of those bother me at all, because I know people are just being friendly. Er...and I may have said that to other moms myself once or twice. My favorite reply is usually "Yes, and we like it that way!"
Charlotte's 2nd Birthday |
What kind of crazy comments do you hear when your family goes out? I'm betting some of you with multi-racial families get alllll kinds of goodies.
I would often hear, "These are your kids? But you're so young." I heard this so much that I started saying, "You're right, I am - you take them." People are curious (I guess) but they do a really bad job of communicating that.
ReplyDeleteI get that a lot too! People always tell me that I look younger than my age. That is good news for the future I guess! Right now it seems to make people think I started having babies at 12.
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